THE SEASONS OF LIFE (1)

Spring

Childhood:  Trust

Victor M. Eskew

 

INTRODUCTION

 

A.    A person is born into this world on his/her birth day.

1.      The spirit is perfect because it is God who gave it (Eccl. 12:7; Zech. 12:1; Heb. 12:9).

2.      The little infant is an empty slate waiting to be written upon. 

a.      That writing begins immediately.

b.      What is written determines much of what the child becomes.

 

B.      To be successful, and we use that term broadly, the individual will have to reach certain milestones in his/her life.

1.      Milestone:  a significant aspect of development in the life of a person

2.      There are many milestones that need to be accomplished. 

a.      We could take a brief moment on several.

b.      Or, we can focus upon one significant milestone during each “season” of life.

 

C.     We will divide your lives into four sections:

1.      Spring:  childhood (0-12)

2.      Summer:  youth (13-27)

3.      Fall:  middle age (28-65)

4.      Winter:  old age (65+)

 

D.    In this lesson, we will discuss, Spring:  Childhood (0-12).  There is one milestone that definitely needs to be developed.  It is TRUST.

 

E.      Windows exercise:  Trust

1.      Define trust.

2.      On a scale of 0 to 10, 0 being none and 10 being completely, how would you judge your trust level?

3.      In what way has someone ever violated your trust?

4.      How much do you trust God?  (on a scale from 0% to 100% in 10% intervals)

 

I.                   TRUST:  THE DEFINITION

 

A.    Dictionary.com:  reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing

 

B.      Another:  putting part or all of our care into the hands of another

1.      Exercise:  a trust fall

2.      Illustration:  a child on the second floor of a burning building and asked by firefighters to jump into their hands.

 

 

II.                THE DEVELOPMENT OF TRUST

 

A.    As an infant

1.      Feeding

2.      Changing a diaper

3.      Taking care of hurts

4.      Protection from harm

5.      NOTE:  Some of these actions done by parents continue until a child leaves the home.

 

B.      Caregivers

 

C.     Teachers

 

D.    Friends

 

E.      People in positions of authority

1.      Minister

2.      Police officers

3.      Principal

4.      Coaches

 

F.      During these years, we begin to develop our trust in God.

 

III.             THREE MAJOR LEVELS OF TRUST

 

A.    The levels

1.      Proper trust:  we learn when to give and when to withhold our trust

2.      No trust:  we do not trust anyone, even those who are trustworthy

3.      Too much trust:  we trust anyone regardless of who they are

 

B.      Chart

 

No trust…………………………….Proper trust…………………………Too much trust

                  0                                                         5                                                           10  

 

1.      Different forms of trust are found between zero and ten.

2.      Our trust level can be different for different people.

a.      We give our parents one level of trust.

b.      We give our friends another level of trust.

c.       We give our teachers another level of trust.

 

IV.             THINGS THAT ADVERSELY IMPACT OUR TRUST

 

A.    A failure to have our needs cared for.  This is often called “neglect.”

 

B.      Someone harms us (Ex., abuse as a child)

 

C.     Someone fails to protect us (Ex., the father abuses, and the mother does not protect)

 

D.    A person leaves us, either choosing to do so, or, through death.

 

E.      People do not meet our expectations.

 

F.      Circumstances in life are adverse over and over again.

 

G.     A person lies to us.

 

H.    A person violates our confidence.

 

I.        A person makes fun of us.

 

J.        We are constantly belittled and criticized.

 

K.     Our prayers go unanswered.

 

V.                A LACK OF TRUST BRINGS CONSEQUENCES

 

A.    Dependence on self

 

B.      The use of a lot of defense mechanisms, that is, anything to protect self

 

C.     Confidence in only a very small group of people

 

D.    Cynicism

 

E.      Anger

 

F.      Hatred

 

G.     Rebellion against authority

 

H.    Bad behavior

 

I.        Abuse to others

 

VI.             SOME TRUTHS ABOUT TRUST

 

A.    Trust is not something earned.  It something that we risk by giving.

1.      A child gets a speeding ticket doing 80 in a 35.

2.      The parents take away the keys for a month.

3.      At the end of the month, what has the child done to prove she no longer has a lead foot?  Nothing.

4.      The parents give their trust back to the child.  There is a risk that they assume.

 

B.      Once trust has been violated, we can learn to give it again.

 

C.     Trust should be given or withheld on a person-by-person basis.

1.      Trusting everyone can get us hurt.

2.      Trusting no one can cause us to lose blessings.

 

D.    We are not always wise to trust ourselves (See Proverbs 16:25).

 

There is a way that seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.

 

E.      There are different levels of trust violation.

1.      All human beings can violate our trust.

2.      Illustration of differences:

a.      A mother fails to feed her child for two or three days

A mother who gets too busy to prepare a good meal.

b.      A parent who yells and screams and belittles a child every day.

A friend who is having a bad day and yells at us.

c.       A father who leaves us when we are 5 or 6 years old.

A teacher who fails to show up for an appointment after class.

 

F.      God can always be trusted.

1.      He cannot lie (Tit. 1:2).

2.      He cares for us (I Pet. 5:7).

3.      He will provide for us (Matt. 6:25-30).

4.      He will always do what is right (Duet. 32:4)

5.      He gives only good and perfect gifts (James 1:17).

6.      He will never forsake us (Heb. 13:5-6)

7.      He will stand when others will not (II Tim. 4:17).

 

CONCLUSION

 

A.    Most of you have already developed trust.

 

B.      Throughout life, trust will be tested.

 

C.     Throughout life, you will give and refrain from giving trust.

 

D.    As you go through certain situations in life, your trust in various areas will be altered.

1.      Parents divorce later in life

2.      People in authority treat you badly

3.      Friends betray your trust

4.      Your boyfriend/girlfriend and husband/wife relationships

 

E.      Always turn to God in complete trust (Prov. 3:5).

 

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.  In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.  Be not wise in thine own eyes:  fear the Lord, and depart from evil.  It shall be health to thy navel, and marrow to thy bones.